Love Yourself

"Who's the cutest kitty ever?" I asked Holly, in that annoying, octave-higher-than-usual voice suited only for babies and animals.  (Sometimes, I just can't stand how stinkin' precious she is.)

"I am," she purred. 

"Mmm hmm."

"And....

I'm the sweetest...

And the silkiest...

And the orangest...

And the nicest...

And the funnest...

And the sassiest...

Smartest...

Most adorable and lovable..."

"Wow, that's quite a list there, Hol," I retorted playfully, shaking my head.

"Well you've gotta love yourself before anyone else can love you."

It's a difficult concept, isn't it?  Loving yourself.  I don't know about you, but I could probably list 100 faults before I could find one positive thing to say about myself.  Humility is indeed a virtue, but what many of us do to ourselves is not humility--it's abuse.

That may very well be the reason (or at least a big part of the reason) I'm on my own at the moment since, in all fairness, I can't expect someone to love me for me when I'm not willing to afford myself the same courtesy. Nor can I convince myself I'm deserving.

So in honor of Holly, the new year, and that certain holiday that just so happens to fall on this day, I'm going to try driving Cupid's arrow into my own heart for a change. 

Here goes...

I love that I've grown to be so health conscious.  While I used to sustain myself with whatever was affordable, convenient, and tasted good, I now am extremely cognizant of what I put in my body--what it's made with, where it comes from, how it affects me and the environment.  Granted, much of this came by necessity once my super holistic nutritionist zeroed in on some severe food intolerances, but embracing that knowledge was a personal decision I'm glad to have made. 

I love that I'm becoming increasingly comfortable with myself in my natural form.  Sure, I still wish my body was a little thinner and my hair a little thicker.  But considering that not even five years ago, I frequented the tanning bed, made regular trips to the nail salon, thought nothing of coloring my hair with ammonia- and peroxide-based dyes, obsessed over my weight, and wouldn't even wander out to the mailbox without a full painted face, I think I'm doing okay.  Better than okay.  Not having a high cancer risk or large carbon footprint makes me feel more beautiful than an evenly bronzed and flawlessly made-up complexion.  Most days, I go to work (yes, in public) without wearing any make-up (and if I do decide to sport a little mascara, you can bet I've checked what's in it via the Environmental Working Group's Cosmetic Safety Database first).  I no longer color my hair and recently stopped straightening the stringy waves I always loathed (you'll be shocked at how much your electric bill goes down after you retire the blow dryer and flat iron).  I don't even own a scale anymore.  And I wouldn't dream of undergoing the plastic surgery I was at one time convinced would be the only key to my happiness. (Seriously, ladies especially, if any of this resonates with you--please, please, please cut yourself free from the vicious grasp of vanity.  I promise you won't regret it.) 

I love that I'm an Indigo and am grateful (SO grateful) to have crossed paths with several teachers who've helped me understand what that means and why I always felt lost and disconnected.  My struggles from youth into early adulthood were given purpose, and I now have a much clearer sense of where I fit into this plane.  (I was tempted to delete this one since so many consider the aura stuff rubbish, but, once I remembered that my entire blog is about having lengthy conversations in my head with my cats and rabbits, decided it was safe to share with this audience.)

And, of course, I love that I've opened myself to communicating beyond the traditional written and oral forms I studied for six and a half years in college.  The work I'm doing with animals is nothing short of amazing, but I'm also finding myself able to establish deeper and more meaningful connections with people as a result. 

Now it's your turn to show yourself a little compassion and kindness.  Holly and I will be eager to hear what you come up with, you fabulous thing.  Happy Valentine's Day!